Showing posts with label milestone. Show all posts
Showing posts with label milestone. Show all posts

Sunday, 30 October 2011

The difference of a year

This day one year ago I was in hospital, I'd been there since Friday and wouldn't come home until Tuesday night after the doctors found worms in my stomach and believed this was the cause of my pains. Obviously they weren't.

My cousins N and A who I often visit in the holidays came to visit me in hospital. I remember being on a drip so I couldn't really play with them like I would have liked to. My mum, dad and brother were there too. My brother took my cousins with him to the 'play room' and I stayed in bed. I remember getting out of bed for the first time and sitting in the rocking chair and chatting. I remember they gave me a pair of pink slippers which I still have and wore every time I was into hospital. They cheered my up and gave me company that I really needed back then. They broke up my day and made time go so much faster.

Today they are coming over for dinner. This time at my house, I will swim in the pool with N and A and play with them how I badly wanted to this time last year. I will not sit back and watch, I won't have a drip in my arm and I will certainly thank them for taking time out of their day to visit me today and for visiting me this day last year.

One year on, who could have known I'd be where I am now, still sick but so much better than last year!!

Happy Sunday!!

Charlotte;)

Thursday, 27 October 2011

One Year {365 Days}

It's been a year!! One whole year, I really can't believe it. I've had a birthday, Christmas, Easter, holidays, a funeral, a new school year, a whole bunch of medical and school tests and heaps of other things too!!

It's a big thing for me to have come one year, it seems to have gone quickly but then when I look back at the things that have happened over the past 12 months, it feels like forever. I can look back on the many many things I have missed out on but what would be the point?? So today I look back on the things I have achieved. The big things and the small, the important things and the minor, the triumphs not the tragedies.

I can remember back to the first night I spent in hospital, the day after I originally got sick, it was Thursday October 28 2010 and I can remember thinking that I would be all better by the next Tuesday at least, I don't know why I thought Tuesday but I did.

If I could go back to that night I'd tell myself to get ready to be sick for awhile, get ready for doctors appointments after doctors appointment, get ready for more days off school than you thought possible, get ready to have to give up guides and sport, get ready to go through more than you could ever imagine, get ready to see how absolutely amazing your mother is, get ready to see how your friends will support you in any way they can, get ready to see how good your school can be to you, get ready to see the love that is in your family, get ready to show how strong you can be, get ready to be frustrated, upset and just plain tired, get ready to feel like you want to give up but you just know you can't so you don't, get ready to test your strength, get ready to test your faith, get ready to test your patience, get ready to get on with your life like nothing's wrong, get ready to be amazed by those around you and get ready to also amaze those around you.

Today I celebrate what is means to me to have been sick for one year. How I have changed, how I've grown mentally and physically. How I now see things in a different light. How I now take joy in doing small things and how I have come to appreciate my family and friends so much more.

I have come so far in one year, experienced so much, laughed so much but cried too. I have had experiences I never thought I would have and I've gone through things I could have never imagined. I have put my family through things I never want to again but they have never once complained, never once given up and never once stopped loving me.

Today I need to thank those who have supported me and loved me over the past year no matter how hard it has been.
My mum who has been with me the whole way, every night I have spent in hospital she was there, every time I've been sick she was there, every time I wanted to give up she helped me to stay strong and I can never thank her enough.
My father who has looked after my brother in all this, supported my mum and visited me every day that I was in hospital, he brought me food that actually tasted good, he sat with me when mum needed a break, he made me laugh until I felt so sick I had to stop, he's come to many appointments and I love him dearly.
My grandma who visited me in hospital, looked after me whenever mum and dad had to work, cleaned up after I was sick all over the bed, given me many little treats to cheer me up and comes over in the middle of the night just to sit with us when I am very sick and I can't sleep.
My brother who has had to go through this too, the worry he must have felt, the disruption in his life and most of my parents attention being on me, he has never complained. He brought me up a photo of Honney with a piece of his fur in it when I was in hospital and I'll never forget that.
My friends M, E and L who have supported me no matter what, when I was really sick on school camp they stayed up with me all night even though they had many physical activities the next day, now that I'm gluten free they always get gluten free food for me and whenever we order pizza at school they make sure we have gluten free one even if the normal one is better and every single day of school I have missed I have caught up because of them, they give me their notes and any handouts we were given. They are truly amazing friends.
My whole extended family who have always asked how I am and asked how they can help us. They have all been so kind to us.
My Mums friend Tc (I call her that) who has always been ready to take me to hospital, take me to doctors appointment, she often comes over for a visit to make sure we are all doing alright and to brake up my days, last year when I didn't go to to school and all I pretty much did was sleep and rest at home or in hospital I can remember her coming over and just laying with mum and I and talking she makes time go so much faster, she is always willing to look after my brother when both my parents are with me at either appointments or at the hospital and she is always ready to do anything for me.
My teachers, espicially my year 8 co-ordinator for all of their continual support and understanding.
And anyone else who has been there for me and supported me.

I have gotten so much better over the past year and come so far since last October but  have so much further to go to get back to last September when I was not sick.

Today I will celebrate with a small party with my friends at school with pizza and brownies.

Charlotte;)

Tuesday, 27 September 2011

11 Months

I have now been sick for 11 months. When I first got sick I remember thinking I would be better by the next week and as 1 month came and 2 months and so on I realised that I was very wrong. To get rid of my stomach pains would not take 1 week, not one month possibly even not one year but some day I believe I will get rid of them.

Life is so different with pain and sickness. Before this I would never have to worry what classes I was missing if I had doctors appointments or how many days I had been sick the term. I missed over 1/5 of last term whereas before I got sick I probably had 1 or 2 days of the whole year. Not only do I miss school but I have had to give up all sport. That is one thing I really look forward to after I get better.

But even though things are a lot tougher they could have been worst. I have something treatable, I'm getting treated for it and my doctor is not giving up until I have got rid of Blastocysts. Complaining, crying and whinging is not going to heal me but make me worse. I need to be positive, I need to keep hope and I need to keep faith.

One day I will get better but that one day just hasn't come yet.

Charlotte;)

Saturday, 27 August 2011

10 months!!

Today I have been sick for TEN months!! Ten months ago today was the first time I'd ever had stomach pains and tomorrow ten months ago was the first time I had been to hospital. I can't remember what it's like to not have pain. My new normal is pain. It seems like I've had this for longer than ten months but ten months is a long time.

So far I have been suspected of having appendicitis, crohns, polyps, IBS and heap of other things. I've been diagnosed with Blastocyts. I've seen over 50 different doctors and they all pretty much have no idea what's wrong.

Today I feel pretty good though!! I think I mightn't be gluten free any more!! I have eaten 3 pieces of bread, 1 chocolate croissant, a few crumbed prawns and 2 crumpets today!! They all contain gluten and I've had no reaction whatsoever. Before I would have had really bad pains in less than 10 minutes.

So overall I'm still sick but I'm slowly getting better. I am having really bad nausea every.single.day at the moment, my stomach pain are pretty good, I'm still feeling quite tired and fatigued, I still sometimes feel dizzy and my bowels aren't working but apart from that I'm feeling pretty good. I've still got a long way to get back to my normal self but I'm closer than I was last November.

I hope everyone is having a great weekend!!

Charlotte;)